Anger

Anger is something that we all experience from time to time, but for some of us it is a regular occurrence.  When it gets to a point where our families, friends and workmates are suffering for it, then something needs to give.  If you are struggling not to wear your cranky pants, here are a few tips to manage those more explosive emotions.

Buttons - When someone really pushes our buttons, it’s a giant clue that we have buttons to push.  What does that mean? Well, chances are you have some old programming running your show, and that comment your co-worker made just reminded you that you aren’t good enough or that you are a giant failure.  If that’s the case – remember you are human, and that’s all quite normal – BUT, it’s not very helpful.  Find someone who can work with you around that old programming so it’s harder to push those buttons.  NLP and Eutaptics are two modalities I find helpful, but there are heaps of others.

Don’t take it personally – when someone has accused you of something or been really rude, and you KNOW you didn’t do anything wrong, then remember – it’s not about you.  They aren’t coping well with something, but it’s not your fault. Maybe they could do with some support.  Or maybe you need to just walk away and say to yourself – Not my circus, not my monkeys. 

Breathe – go lock yourself in a cupboard or go for a walk, and just focus on your breathing.  In, and out.  When we are in an emotional state we tend to hyperventilate or not breathe much at all, and that does NOT help us to make logical decisions.  Learn some breathing techniques to help you manage stress and emotions.  The Wim Hoff method is quite popular at the moment, or learn some yogic breathing.

Exercise – get the blood and endorphins flowing!  Go for a run, walk or find a punching bag and go nuts.   Safely.

Aromatherapy – breathe in your coffee, find some roses in the garden, or grab your favourite essential oil.  The sense of smell works directly on the amygdala, which is the emotional part of your brain, so can calm you down fast, as long as the smell doesn’t have any bad memories associated with it!  When we are highly charged and triggered by something, we tend to 'flip our lid' - which basically means that our logical brain stops working and our emotional brain takes over.  Ever noticed how when you get REALLY cranky you can't seem to string a decent sentence together?  That's why.  By utilising the power of the sense of smell, we can get that logical brain functioning again a bit faster than otherwise.  Just remember to use high quality, therapeutic grade essential oils.  You can learn more about why that is important by downloading my free ebook here:  The 6 Mistakes to Avoid When Buying Essential Oils.

Rip, stomp and tear - write it all down, then tear it up, burn it in a fire pit, or stomp on it. It’s surprisingly therapeutic.

And finally - if anger is a serious problem for you, it would be a good idea for you to see a professional psychologist to discuss what else is going on under the surface.  There is no shame in admitting you have a problem, but imagine what the impact might be if you let it take over your life.  No one wants that.  

Here is to living your best life – catch you next time!